Attention seeking..

As I sit here thinking about how many times I’ve heard someone say they are only doing this for attention, I’ve come to a conclusion.

Yes, we probably are doing it for some kind of attention. Attention for someone to help us because we don’t know how to ask for it ourselves. Attention for people to understand what mental illness really is and does to us. Attention for someone to care about us.

I know when I thought about suicide I ended up telling someone, because A. I didn’t really want to do it. And B. I wanted someone to stop me to show me they cared enough about me to tell me that wasn’t the right choice.

You may think wow she’s really demented or stupid to do that. You know what? Yeah maybe I was stupid to do that. But do you see me here today? Yeah, you do. I got to the point in life where I didn’t think anyone cared about me even my family. Do you know what that feels like? No of course you don’t. Not unless you’ve been in the shoes of someone who has. It’s a horrible feeling, thinking you’re alone in this world. Alone in life with no one who you can go to no one to be in your corner. I love my family to death but for the longest time I felt like they thought I had the plague or something. They never really asked how I was doing or if I was okay.

Skip to today. I’ve educated my family more and more. I’ve talked to them about what my needs are. They ask how I’m doing when we talk on the phone and my dad especially tries to help the most when I’m feeling down. I’ve scared them a time or two. And for that I feel horrible.

So I ask my friends, before you complain that someone is acting out or saying things for attention and being snarky about it, think. Do you know this person? Do you know about their support system? Do you know about them in any way shape or form? No? Then don’t judge. Message them ask if they need someone to talk to. Ask questions. Don’t assume they want the attention for pity. They probably don’t. I’ve actually worried myself that people would think I started this blog for attention and pity. Guess what? I did start it for attention. Attention for education of mental health. Attention for support, for clarity, for myself.

I hope you guys are benefitting from these blogs. I would love some feedback guys!

Peace and love my wonderful support system ✌🏻💕

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