Holidays

Happy Easter my friends and family. Do you ever wonder what it feels like to go to family gatherings with major anxiety and depression disorder? I will tell you it’s not fun to start out.

You’re probably thinking there’s no problem, you’re with family. You should be comfortable around them. Well you would think you’d be right. But at least in my case you’re wrong. I have social anxiety to top it off so any type of gatherings are hard for me.

I legit get panic attacks at any family gathering. I worry someone is going to make a comment about what I’m doing or how I’m dressed. I worry constantly if they will compare me to my sister. I worry that I won’t be good enough that my family won’t want to call me family. Crazy right? Try telling my brain to think anything else.

My cousin had a wedding and all of us were packed into a tiny space but they are family so you would t think again I’d get a panic attack right? Wrong. I had a massive panic attack. Surrounded by my family. The people you’d think I would feel most comfortable with.

Holidays are hard guys, very hard. Now that I’m dating and going to Terry’s family gatherings as well I start to get those feelings of worry and concern that they will be judging me, thinking if I’m good enough for Terry. If I’m wearing the right thing and being compared to the other girls in the family.

Here’s the kicker. I know they love me like I was family. They include me in a lot of family things. They don’t do any of the above that I can prove. Yet my brain still tells me they are. Tells me I’m not good enough.

So if you see your loved one sitting alone or not really participating in the festivities do one of two things. Go make sure they are okay. Make sure they don’t need to step out and have a breather. Or leave them alone. They might need time to process what’s going on and to calm themselves down.

Peace and love and hoppy Easter! ✌🏻💕🐣🐰

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